Accha kiya ya bura kiya? I guess , bura kiya cause I am feeling baaaaadddd. But there is always a down side to all good things. It's good to fail once in a while. Why??? Tabhi toh success ki aihmiyat pata chalti hai.
Am I solely responsible for this "failure"? Maybe. Wrong judgement. Could be...Not being in sync with the "leader"? Definetly...
I am thinking, why is it essential for me to find reasons for a project gone wrong. In my mind I know that it has to do with only one person. It has to do with being unable to deal with mediocrity. It has to do with me wanting to be in the driving seat, without a backseat driver…
But why am I feeling baaaaadddd about taking a call? I am being selfish, that's why! Ayn Rand says its good to be selfish. But she doesn't say what to do with emotional attachements that make you feel guilty...
Brings me to another question. Is it possible to do mentoring and guiding without being involved? What relationship should a mentor and mentee have? All my pride at being able to handle varied set of people is in vain, I have realized. In reality, I am only handling myself and my own emotions. I cannot handle all kinds of people. Lots to learn! I am now realizing, how much more I need to learn about influencing skills, patience and self-appreciation. I must acknowledge here that I have also decided to call it quits , cause there have been zero positive strokes since the project started. And there were none after asking for them... shameless , in Indian context. In our society, one should never ask for compliments... "I thought you knew that you are good OR that you are on right track OR that I love you. Isn't it obvious that i am not correcting you n it means you are ok?... blah... blah.... blah"
Shortcut mein bolega toh, backseat driving just not happening, Bhidu! Not for me at least.... Arre apun ke paas driver ka uniform nahi hai yaar... Aur postman ka toh bilkul hi nahi... That set is extinct and I have no plans to join them....
1 comment:
1. sometimes a leader leads from the front and sometimes from the back. I think the second option needs more patience and more trust in teams and more risk taking.
2. Ayn Rand created profiles of Howard Roark, Dominique, also .. Hank Rearden.... she finds beauty coming out of that selfishness which is either there or not. And the emotion is attached to self and not the effect on another. Actually i liked that.
3. You are human ... even if u got ppl who think u are god. so mistakes are possible. they pave the way for a more perfect future where u could avoid them.
waise me cant picture u as back seat driver at all....
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